Unlocking the Power of Crucial Conversations with Friends
I was fortunate enough to be at Asbury the week before last to work with outstanding leaders from across the USA.
One of the topics was about creating space for ‘crucial conversations’. It was a brilliant conversation, and even after a lifetime of working in conflict resolution situations, I realise I have so much more to learn.
One particular statement made me think about the power of coaching to influence and create space for crucial conversations, and that was when someone stated that we have so many opportunities to have crucial conversations with our friends.
This made so much sense to me. We know it’s true that when a friend speaks into our lives, it has power, firstly because we trust the person and secondly because friends usually want what’s best for us.
Even if we ignore their advice, we will still be friends, and they will accept us unconditionally when we mess up.
This ‘power’ of coaching our friends was brought home yesterday when I met a friend at the gym with whom I’d talked about her ideas for starting a new business a few months ago.
After a few questions from me, she realised that she needed to work on her personal finances to prepare for self-employment.
Yesterday, she excitedly told me that she was genuinely grateful for the previous conversation; her mindset had shifted, enabling her to do the hard work on fixing her finances and that she was ready to move on with her dream.
As always, I was interested in what I had said that unlocked her new thinking and enabled her to take such an eminent step forward in her relationship with money, and she told me it was the two questions I had asked her.
The two questions were:
What would you like to be different?
&
What is the smallest step you can take to move forward?
As we parted, she told me she appreciated our friendship and being able to trust me with such a delicate conversation.
In conclusion, your friends yearn for you to show up and ask these two simple yet life-changing questions.
